I was asked to prepare a talk for a forum panel at Splendour in the Grass this past weekend, it’s reprinted in full at Spike. In it I argue that nerds are the true punks of today, and the internet is their CBGBs.

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Ganguro, like punk or any number of other subcultures, is also associated with a pop music genre: ‘The ganguro culture is often linked with para para, a Japanese dance style. However, most para para dancers are not ganguro, and most ganguro are not para para dancers, though there are many who are ganguro or gal and dance para para.’ So ganguro – as so adroitly illustrated by that tortured sentence — also has a bunch of complicated rules attached to it, like most subcultures do, which is the second most ironic part of aligning yourself with something which you feel will allow you to express your individuality. Along with the hundreds, or thousands, or sometimes hundreds of thousands of other people who also identify with it, and share this feeling of rebellion.

So any subculture, whether it’s punks, mods, rockers, metal heads, skin heads, emos, Goths, skaters, surfers, Norwegian death metal:



will allow you to rebel, so long as you observe the right protocols: wear the right clothes and make up, go to the right clubs, listen to the right records, avoid the right people, disown the right cultural norms, and otherwise spend a lot of money on showing everyone how different you are. In the case of Norwegian black metal, some of the rites of passage are so extreme, like killing people and burning Churches, that perhaps I shouldn’t treat it so flippantly (SORRY ALL BLACK METAL FANS AMONG US).

These rules are all so tiring! So not punk rock! I am weary with irony! What is there left to do for the modern music fan who wants to show, in this age of a million micro sub-genres, just how achingly unique they are? Well, you could get this shirt and hope you never run into another person also wearing it.

Read the rest.

Thanks to @aramadge for the title of the piece.